Teeny Time Travel Tales Read online



  Teeny Time Travel Tales

  Willie Wit

  Copyright 2012 Willie Wit

  *

  Aloha!

  I had a bright idea, 'Teeny Tiny Tales' of only 78 words.

  It's much more of a challenge than you might think, and very like those picture puzzles where you slide the squares around in a grid, until they are in the right order.

  But words are very restless, more, then less, then different.

  To keep in the spirit of the idea — I even made this intro add up to 78 words.

  Willie Wit

  :o)

  1

  The Time Machine hitman was a force of nature, tuning history’s perfect balance when required. Unfortunately his superiors now regarded him as a liability, his knowledge was dangerous - he would only complete one last hit.

  The final target reacted immediately on sensing his presence in the room, now swiftly turning around as the bullet left the barrel. A lightning flash of recognition crossed his face...

  Time seemed to slow to a halt as he screamed one word... “Father!...”

  2

  She had lived now for 100 years, having witnessed amazing changes. Mars had been ravaged following the discovery of gold – the population soaring constantly. Her 'Time Machine' birthday credit would mean she could visit its pristine and unsoiled beginnings.

  On touchdown she surveyed a blank and beautiful vista – overwhelming her senses. Looking up, she witnessed a speeding meteorite heading directly towards her - frozen with alarm she followed its speedy approach...

  Quizzically, she read her last word... 'Beagle'...

  3

  The original Eskimo Time Machine was a joy to behold, stored at absolute zero - its nano gear systems built from snowflakes allowed for infinite calculations. With eco credentials soon revered across the system - it sparkled like a diamond mirage.

  The maiden voyage would show off its full potential, a random mystery tour. But on arrival soon proved shambolic - its owner immediately being showered by drips of water...

  “17 words for snow... but we only need one for heatwave...”

  4

  He carefully adjusted his gladiators helmet, one researched in meticulous detail. Vitally important if he were to survive this most thrilling of adventures.

  Standing up straight, he tightly gripped his sword, one he hoped to be using soon. Taking a deep breath, the Time Machines doors slowly juddered open, he stepped tentatively over the threshold...

  His heart sank as the piano in the corner of the saloon bar became silent... He pondered the wisdom of buying spares on ebay...

  5

  The knitting groups Time Machine was a colourful, detailed and pretty creation. Thousands of strands of wool connected in a complex pattern, circuits carefully designed to explore the fabric of time.

  Sadly, one dropped stitch created an infinity loop, its reverberations would soon be felt by its proud creator... On arriving at Queen Victoria's coronation the doors opened a few inches... and closed again... opened and closed...

  An electronic voice began repeating... “Your journey is... Your journey is...”

  6

  The old time traveller had always loved art, witnessing the creation of these classics enthralled him. During one trip a passport photo slipped unnoticed from his pocket.

  Finding this strange image, a young painter became obsessed with its clarity and vivid colours. He began to work, searching every day to capture its perfect smile.

  The time traveller's interest began in his youth, prompted by friend's continual comments as to his young wife’s remarkable resemblance to the Mona Lisa...

  7

  The tour group returned and the Time Machine filled with lively chatter. Unnoticed by all the tiniest of ants was crushed by the gently closing doors. Instantly an imperceptible ripple passed across times unblemished surface.

  Oblivious to this tragedy the groups volume persisted, until an abrupt silence suddenly fell. The open doors revealing a much changed laboratory – a small man in uniform with curiously familiar mannerisms gesticulated excitedly at technicians.

  The huge swastika behind him was immediately recognisable...

  8

  The Time Machines refurbishment was nearing its completion, a neat array of shiny modern transistors replaced the rows of bulb shaped valves. The unfortunate shorting of a bare connection caused lights to flicker momentarily.

  The dull grey doors closed silently behind him, opening again mere seconds later. The raw blast of fresh sea air caused alarm bells to sound, especially now he realised they were real...

  “The Titanic is sinking!!! Take to the lifeboats immediately...”

  9

  I can't believe people leave the same mess everyday, whoever drinks his coffee in here needs to use a coaster... and his spoon always leaves a mark on the nice shiny surface. They really should take more care.

  'Time Machine Cleaner' - it's the easiest job I have ever had, and it's well paid too. Always lots of regular work, though I never really feel like I get a day off...

  I wonder what this big red switch does...?

  10

  The recent improvement to our Time Machine was 'NvZ' update, finally rendering it invisible to the naked eye wherever it appeared. There had been a few uncomfortable 'blips' in time visits... It also allows whole wall viewing – so you can stay safe and cosy inside if you prefer.

  We had fun recently at the 1966 World Cup final, positioned right in the goal, the ball even bounced right off the window – would you like to see the replay...?

  11

  His forebears vision of computers in every home, and music in every ear would allow his dreams to come true. Investing his inheritance in fulfilling his lifelong ambitions.

  His journey in the quantum Time Machine began the moment he pressed the 'shuffle' button... a quaint family tradition.

  Appearing in an olde worlde 20th century home he found a man in a wheelchair... showing no hint of surprise he announces -

  “My name is Stephen Hawking – I've been expecting you...”

  12

  Despite the Zen master having spent his whole life at the centre of the universe he felt drawn to the Time Machine trip – he had but one dream to fulfil...

  On arriving at the birthplace of Buddhism, he discovered a deep sense of despair. The fig tree the Buddha had found enlightenment under had been deemed unsafe by the local council - and chopped down.

  Enquiries discovered the Buddha himself had recently departed – having joined a travelling circus troupe.

  13

  “I told you tomorrow I have already done it next Tuesday afternoon...”... She could drive me to distraction with her nagging...

  “You said you would paint the front door and fence next Friday – but you won't do it – you have had a lie in instead...”

  “I know but I don't expect to have such a bad nights sleep before...”

  I wish we had never won that Time Machine competition – it has just made our domestic arguments more complicated...

  14

  It's just typical really, no matter how far you have travelled or how careful you are – there's always someone ready to pinch your own Time Machines parking space...

  I pay for this bay so I am going to have to say something... Transporting in a tatty old model like that – really... I haven't seen one of those for decades – he certainly doesn't look like a policeman, and he's wearing a bow tie...

  “Sorry about that – I'm a Doctor...”

  15

  Regularly placing his large mug of tea on the Time Machines control panel was a bad habit he had been warned about. Its pressing against the corner button caused a daily
loop to take place in its circuitry, unnoticed by him as he dozed.

  In a futuristic impound yard a bemused time traveller is being castigated by a stern robotic voice...

  “This vehicle has collected 36,325 unpaid parking tickets, 7 days to pay or it will be scrapped...”

  16

  The Time Machines old wooden cogs and gears had suffered badly from an attack of woodworm, particularly detailed parts concerned with the more delicate and precise calibrations.

  Despite warnings in the instruction manual to carry out this maintenance - the new owner paid no attention. He preferred cavorting with his young wife...

  On returning home one day, his oversight resulted in her now being 73 years his senior – and an interstellar child support agency was chasing him for arrears...

  17

  The Time Machine arrived with a bump, an unusual event indeed. Collisions in time can be seen live, as supernova or black holes. Luckily this was a minor mechanical failure.

  The occupants staggered out into the bright light, surprised by the sun that beat down on them, mirrored in the reflective silver of their suits.

  A search party now left to find help, relieved when they spotted what they were seeking - just over the hill.

  'JOES GARAGE - ROSWELL'

  18

  Distracted by the synchronised chewing gum and filing of nails she absentmindedly pressed switches on her Time Machine, failing to notice her purse obscuring the flashing light warning of 'Battery failure'...

  As the doors opened she surveyed the mediaeval village now filling her view, and senses - her nose instantly informing of her poorly considered choice. There was no way she would be stepping outside in her new Jimmy Choo shoes...

  Thankfully, she wasn’t going to be here long...

  19

  The palaeontologists were shocked, new tests proved the dinosaurs had been wiped out by a huge range of chemicals – it would disprove every previous theory. Science was in turmoil.

  Discussing a business deal, two men in silver suits had a plan... “I picked up this Time Machine at the impound yard sale for a snip. Dumping 100 barrels of toxic waste a day will see us in profit in a month.”

  “Sweet... and who is ever gonna know?”

  20

  An oversight on behalf of the Time Machine day trip planner meant we were going to the moon, never mind we thought – it has always been such a lovely place...

  As the doors opened, a golf ball bounced in – narrowly missing us, coming to a stop in the corner of the room. A startled Neil Armstrong appeared in the doorway, peeking in nervously from behind the tinted glass of his visor – tentatively asking...

  “...Can I have my ball back please...?”

  21

  The latest range of Time Machines were sleak slimline versions, mimicking in appearance telegraph poles or trees - they were unobtrusive when in situe. Technical problems began soon after a dodo urinated on a door control panel.

  Animals throughout time were drawn to this distinctive, pungent scent - eventually causing a near disastrous travel event; one taking place following a robocats ejection of fluid.

  These intermittent short circuits forced the manufacturer to withdraw this unreliable model from its new catalogue.

  22

  The Time Machine brought Willie Wit to an olde smoky tavern, sitting thinking peacefully- he sipped his ginger ale. The local drunkard staggered in - searching for strangers and their loose change; lurching across the room, spying Willie scribbling he bellows -

  “Give me those tiny parchments and I shall add my name to them! Fame and fortune shall follow – for the mere price of a drink!”

  The landlord hearing the commotion cries - “William Shakespeare! - Get out! - you are bard...!

  23

  The Time Machine hitman's best years were long gone now, his legendary status had become a thing of the past. He had heard future rumours – suggesting he had never existed. Spending long days at home he waited patiently for this end...

  Reflections in a family photo made him react - a vertical slash in time opening behind him. Deep survival instincts suddenly made him turn, his bullet proof vest kicked with fierce impact...

  Eyes meet, breathlessly he speaks... “Son...?”

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